Yesterday was a regular morning like any other. Took my shower, got dressed and left the house. I pushed the elevator button and followed the flashing numbers until the doors finally opened at the seventh floor. I got in, pushed the G button and turned around. Then I saw them!The bags under my eyes looked enormous. Fluffy IKEA goose feather duvets were hanging limp under my eyes and then it hit me. This is the price you have to pay for having the honour of sleeping less than 3 hours in total.
Let’s rewind
Almost two years ago, I moved into my apartment building in Abu Dhabi. This building, known by local residents as the Pink Palace has pink window frames, pink pot plants, even pink glass. I mean, Barbie wouldn’t want to live anywhere else! The Pink Palace is built next to one of the largest construction sites in Abu Dhabi. The new ‘Central Market’ has been planned for many years and they started construction somewhere early 2008. I saw the floors rising one by one each day. Wait, let me rephrase that. I HEARD the floors rising one by one as they’ve been building this 70+ floor structure over the last two years. Living in the desert means that it’s easier to work during the night when the temperatures are lower. So for 24/7, construction is going on outside my bedroom window. I’ve taught myself to live through concrete pouring, large cranes dropping piles of steel for meters and even the millions of ants (workers) screaming at one another. Torrent sites have provided me with soothing ‘Forest sounds’, ‘Sea tranquillity’… anything… to help me sleep. I’ve tried meditation, melatonin and … yes… alcohol, just to have some sleep.
Enough is enough
Since Saturday night, two new sounds made their appearance on the block, ‘hammering’ and ‘grinding’. Well, if you count the fact that there are more than two hammers, one can’t ever assume it’s only two new sounds, can you? So, from 11 o’clock to 4am, this continues. And after a short pause, the mosques all over Abu Dhabi start with the morning prayer call.
So, at 2am on Monday morning, those hammers and grinder sounded like they were competing in the Olympics. I shoved my own fingers in my ears. No success. I tried the pillow on my head. Na da. Forest sounds. Nope. Waves crashing to Mozart tunes. No. Birds of Brazil. No. NO. NO.
I got up and marched towards my living room window with my camera in my hands. I needed proof. Concrete (no pun intended) proof. I opened the window and recorded what I had to live with at 2:20 in the morning. After this I phoned the police.
Policeman 1 : As-Salamu Alaykum.
Me: Hey sir! I live next to the Central Market and they’re making so much noise here. I haven’t been able to sleep at all for the last four days and –
Policeman1 : Arabia?
Me : Mafi Arabia. Can you speak English?
Policeman1 : *sigh* Wait! *blabbers in die background*
Policeman2 : As-Salamu Alaykum.
Me: Alaykum As-Salam. Do you speak English sir?
Policeman2: Yes.
Me : I live next to the Central Market and they’re making so much noise here. I haven’t been able to sleep at all for the last four days and…
Policeman2: Yes, they are building over there.
Me : *thinking… NO! REALLY???* Yes, I know they’re building over here, but they’re hammering and grinding at 2am in the morning.
Policeman2 : So, you can’t sleep?
Me : *thinking… no you idiot… I am sleeping at the moment. I have a tendency to phone the police office at this ungodly hour pretending I’m awake!!* No, sir. I can’t sleep, because it’s very noisy. *I open the window* Can you hear?
Policeman2: Wow, it is very noisy. And this at 2:30 in the morning?
Me: *thinking… unless we’re in two different time zones!* Yes sir. Can you PLEASE send someone to shut them up.
Policeman2: Ok, I’ll send someone. You wait outside.
Hell, with a splash of humidity
As you know, the summer is here and I arrived outside with bed hair standing in all directions, armed with my camera and video proof. Waiting. The humidity is super high this time of year and it was about 30 degrees Celsius out there. I waited still. Eventually I saw the patrol car and ran towards them.
Me : As-Salamu Alaykum.
Policeman3: Alaykum As-Salam.
Me : Sir, thanks for coming! These guys are making such a noise. I haven’t been able to sleep for –
Policeman3 : Arabia??
Me : *sigh* Mafi Arabia. You speak English?
The blank facial expression said everything. My phone rings.
Me : Hello.
Policeman2: Hello. The police should be there now.
Me : Yes, thanks. They’re here, but they don’t speak English.
Policemen2: Oh, ok. But I told them. *hangs up*
Policeman 3 and 4 looks at me. I result to sign and sound language. *point point* They GUFFF GUFFF BANG BANGGG *point to my wrist where a watch should sit* NO … uh… MAFI SLEEP *pretend I’m sleeping*
I turn on the camera and show them the video footage.
Policeman 3 and 4 are agreeing in unison that it’s “Very BAD! TOO MUCH!”
FINALLY! EUREKA!! They feel my pain!!!
A man from the contraction site walks closer.
Policeman3: blah blah Arabic blah.
Worker : blah blah Urdu blah.
Me : *looks at worker* English?
Worker : Mafi Englezi (No English)
Policeman3: Arabia?
Worker: blah Urdu blah. Mafi Arabia.
Me : *SIGH!!!* You DUFFF DUFF GWARRR GWAARRRR 3 o’clock morning! BAD VERY BAD!!!
Policeman4: You want sue??
Me: *thinking… some English! Amazing! And are you kidding? I sue the Sheikh’s company? What’s the odds of winning that one??* Not sue, just sleep!
Eventually another man (looking like a supervisor )walks up. He asks what the problem is in English. He apologizes to the police in Arabic and asks me to follow him. The police wave and I follow, thinking how amazing this Babel of a city is.
The Supervisor wasn’t very happy that I phoned the police, but I told him that I had no choice as this has been going on for days. He handed me a cherry red hard hat and I showed him the origin of the sounds from hell. He came around the corner and we caught 4 ants with hammers and one with the grinder. He immediately told them to ‘drop their weapons’ and they followed orders. They looked very shocked to see the Gora (Hindi for white foreigner) on the site at this hour!! The supervisor apologized again and gave me his cell phone number, saying that if I have any more problems, I should phone him directly. I’m so honoured to have a Construction site manager on Speed dial now! Do you?
So here I was, wide awake, handing back the red hat and returning to the Pink Palace. It was after 3 and I had to wake up before six. I lied down on the bed and there it was. SILENCE. Absolute SILENCE. No concrete, no hammers, no grinder. Not a squeak. My subconscious was so used to having some kind of noise level, that I couldn’t sleep as it was TOO quiet. Well, isn’t this just nice? I do think that I fell asleep around 5ish, just after the morning prayer call. What a wonderful life, I lead.
So the bags under the eyes are looking more like flabby tummy fat than bloated gym balls today, a sure sign that a good night’s rest might be heading my way … very soon. Watch this space.
posted by Marion @ 3:47 PM
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